Help 13U with bad body language??

[2zwudz]

OK I need help with a couple of 13U boys I have this year. They are having a hard time with getting upset with themselves if something doesn't go their way, making an error, striking out, or control problems while pitching,etc. I am trying to help them have better body language and forget about the error etc. It just adds fuel to the other teams confidense. It also spreads thru out the team when this happens. We are half way thru the season and I haven't been able to break the trend. Can the trend be broken? Is there a way to help them with their body language. I think its normal to have emotions but I would like to help them have better body language and not show their frustrations on the field. Although our record (.500) doesn't show it we are a pretty good team. We have played alot of good teams.

Your help is GREATLY appreciated
Mark

[All-StarLF1713]

i've had the same problems. well with myself. im 14. i used to let something get to me. i would throw my helmet after a k, get GAHHHH after a bad call. but one of my coaches actually pulled me aside and told me that i could be the best person on the team, but the only thing that seperates me from the other best player is that i need to control my emotions. its helped. now i hide my emotions really well. tell them that it looks dumb. and stupid.

[rbgrubbs]

Plus some....had similiar problems and consulted an elemetry school teacher....

He will remain nameless...but his approach, Embarass them.

He said that the first week of every school year, he picked out the "most likely to offend" kids and waited for them the act up...at which point he embarasses them infront of their peers...(sit them up front with him, hold his hand in lines, etc...)

He said the greatest motivator for a kid is his peers and once they loose that "step in the pecking order" they become good kids.

I have a little control over the kids that I coach now, but have used the "embarass them" approach with great success in the past

[All-StarLF1713]

well its more like it's the kids embarrassing themselves, in my first post. you look at other kids flipping out and it looks stupid. once, in a game where i made an error and we eventually lost the game because of me, i saw a kid on my team throw his glove, so i did it. i felt so juvenile. i knew it looked stupid when other ppl did it, but i didnt make the connection to me. it's not so embarassing if the coach brings the kid(s) aside and tells them. but in front of the kids' other teammates is a big no-no

[2zwudz]

All star

Being 14, recognizing this and changing your thought process is a big inspiration for other kids younger than you. GOOD job and good luck. Your coach has tought you something very valuable for your years ahead of you.

Thanks
Mark

[dolphindan1]

I am having a problem with a kid on my travel team...12u...probably out best player. He bats cleanup and is use to hitting bombs...well this weekend he went 1-12...1 HR and the rest K's...he was slamming his stuff and crying and just emotionally drained by the end of the tournament...I am just not sure how to deal with...

I tried to explain to him he is trying too hard and that is making him tight in the box...and making him swing at bad pitches...I also told him a #4 batter is not gonna get alot of easy stuff to hit...that they have to be more disciplined than most....Also told him to just trust your eyes....relax...see it and hit...Mechanically he looks fine...So I think its all mental right now

[ralanprod]

Check out the book Heads-Up Baseball : Playing the Game One Pitch at a Time by Tom Hanson.

To me it's really aimed at the high school player and above, but there is much that can be applied to younger kids.

Because of that book, my motto to the players (9-10) I had this season was, "I cannot change the play that has just happened, but I can change the one that will happen next." It worked better with some kids than others, but overall I saw very few "meltdowns" so I guess it worked well enough.

[MrUmpireSir]

I will leave the advice as to how to deal with it to coaches, who are experienced in these matters.

I will point out, though, that bad habits and behaviour at lower levels of ball grow into serious conduct issues at higher levels. Better for the young lads to correct the behaviours early on. As a general development issue, have you considered working with the League and umpires to come up with a common strategy as to how you would like these matters handled? Just a thought....

[emmitt]

I saw this a lot in our 7-8 year old rec league. For this age, the emotion is usually crying and not anger though. We would have our pitcher give up a hit and he would start balling like his dog died. Me and the other coaches had gotten tired of it by the end of the season. Some of the kids that didn't cry started to cry because they saw the other kids do it and thought they were supposed to.

For our 7U travel team, the rule is that if you start crying or throw a fit you leave the field and go sit in the dugout. We have several other kids that are pretty good sitting on the bench that would be glad to take your spot. This seems to have worked for the most part. Hopefully if we start them young they won't have this problem when they get older.

[Ursa Major]

2zwudz, we had just those problems with our 13 - 14 y/o team this year. Our manager was beside himself, but part of the problem was that his own son was the biggest miscreant and rarely got admonished, so the other kids figured it was okay. Ursa Minor has been beside himself and can't figure out what he can do other than try to set an example -- which of course is ignored by the kids who either act up or throw fits.

Part of it is the age issue -- their emotions are just in weird places. We've got one kid who's thoughtful and funny and very mature -- he and I have some great, adult level conversations about all sorts of stuff. But he's got about a three second hair trigger if something goes wrong, and he's the only kid in the league to get ejected this year. (He got tagged in the face on a steal attempt and responded by standing up suddenly and "accidentally" headbutting the second baseman. BOOM - he was tossed.) Our catcher could have been an all-star, but he is all-world at finding someone else to blame when he screws up and has been on the verge of being tossed a couple of times. About four of the kids tend to throw things at each other on the bench -- usually during the seventh inning of a tight ballgame. Another rifles through his teammates' bat bags looking for food.

But trying to improve their body language? Sulking and grumping for early teens is like their natural state. One thing that may help is having them play a really good travel squad or watch their local high school varsity team. Any kid who tries those antics is guaranteed a seat on the pine.

[Baseball gLove]

I have always coached my kids that they can't show negative feelings when either they or their teammates make a mistake. I've told my kids that if they did, other teams would use it against them. I have repeated to them time after time that they need to have their teammates' backs because that is what team is about.

[AgentX]

I say use the bench. This is a pretty common problem for kids this age, but that also means that mom & dad are probably pretty sick of it too. So you'll probably get some support for benching bad attitudes.

The reason these issues persist is because there is no follow-through. Almost every coach I've ever seen threatens it, but none ever really do it. Kids know that.

The better players tend to get away with it more, because there is usually less repercussion for them. They tend to expect to play no matter what. But if you show you're willing to bench ANYONE who feels the need to "express their disappointment" in front of the whole team, then it will send a clear message that you won't tolerate it. The rest of the team will probably catch on in a hurry.

[rkbenn]

Never let them see you sweat! I had a great american, Capt Smoker of the USAF tell me that you should never lose your composer in the heat of battle. It's bad for moral and fuel for the enemy.

RK