What should I do?

[9fruitcrush9]

I'am A girl and my father won't let me play baseball what should I do?? And i'am actually good!Please reply.

9fruitcrush9

[NotAboutEgo]

Hi,

First of all, how old are you? Second, ask your father what his reasoning is for not wanting and letting you play baseball. Ask him if his reasons are because he doesn't think girls should play baseball, and if that's it, ask him why he thinks that. If he can't give you a good reason, then he has a closed mind and is falling into the trap of others who think the same way.

Present it in a positive way and reason with him, but don't argue and don't beg. Do a little research on women's baseball, if you haven't already, so you can back yourself up when presenting your case. The more knowledgeable you are about the topic, the more open he may be to listening to what you have to say. Ask him if he thinks you will get hurt playing baseball. Do you currently play other sports? If so, then tell him you aren't at anymore risk playing baseball. I play hockey and other sports, and I have been hurt more in sports other than in baseball. Not saying you won't get hurt, but that's a risk everyone has to assume when playing any kind of sport.

If your father's reasoning is because he doesn't want you to have to deal with the negativity that can follow a female who wants to play baseball, then he has somewhat of a good reason. But, you still have to learn to deal with such issues, because they are going to pop up all throughout your life. Is he overprotective of you? If so, then he should learn to let go of his insecurity and should let you try things you enjoy doing. He can't protect you in every situation, and you have to experience the world in order to learn and grow.

When I was about 9, I remember hearing my dad telling my mom that all businesses are out to do is to rip everyone off. I remember thinking, "What is he talking about?" I was pretty shocked by his comment. First of all, I have learned, through life experiences, that not every business is about ripping everyone off. What does this have to do with you wanting to play baseball? Well, it's an example of how you learn and grow through life experiences, and also, one's opinion of something may not be completely accurate. Perhaps your dad should hear YOUR angles on why he should allow you to play baseball... simply because you like it, you are good at it, you should be able to try anything you want to try (within reason, of course), etc.

Do you have any brothers, and if so, does he allow them to do those same things he tells you he won't allow you to do? If so, he is being sexist and overprotective. Why should females have restrictions placed upon them when males don't? It's about educating people so they don't have such closed minds to things such as this.

Hope this helps. I am interested in hearing what happens, so please keep us informed!

[9fruitcrush9]

ummm. Well i do play a lot of sports:fastpitch softball,soccer,and volleyball.
but I would really like to play it looks like fun.i(am 12)I have a little bro but hes only 5. I really dont know y he wont let me play he always says hes will back me up on anything i want to do/play.:noidea

[NotAboutEgo]

OK. Ask him why he doesn't want you to play, and then remind him that he said he will back you up on anything you want to do, and that's what parents do. Tell him you count on him to back you up, and you look up to him for his support. Tell him you shouldn't be held back from doing something you enjoy and that will benefit you just because you are a girl. Then, go from there. Be open and converse with him but don't argue or beg or whine about it (not saying that you do, but some kids do that and it irritates parents, then they say no for good). Be mature about it and state your case in an educated manner.

[5LilPlayers]

ummm. Well i do play a lot of sports:fastpitch softball,soccer,and volleyball.
but I would really like to play it looks like fun.i(am 12)I have a little bro but hes only 5. I really dont know y he wont let me play he always says hes will back me up on anything i want to do/play.:noidea
Do you play fast-pitch for school? There are just as many accidents in fast-pitch school softball as there is in Little League baseball...possibly less in Little League. Little League has the backing to be able to afford the proper equipment, schools rarely do, unless you go to a private school, then they might be able to afford better equipment. I played slow-pitch softball in grade school, for the (public) school...the only "extra" equipment we had....the catcher had a catcher's mask....no shin guards, not even chest protectors then.

Plus, also let your dad know that there are several options when it comes to equipment if you're being hurt is a major reason why he doesn't want you to play. They now have heartguards for youths. There are guards to put in your mitt to protect your thumb), mainly for catchers. I haven't seen a league that doesn't require batting helmets.

Injuries happen...but in most leagues, there are so many precautions, a serious injury is rare. You have to know that, too, though. While VERY slim, there is still a chance of a serious injury, even death, in almost any sport. Also, if his fear is of you getting hurt...remind him that you could trip walking out of your house and break your ankle or an accidental fall off your bike and you could break your arm. There is gear for every sport possible nowadays yet accidents can't be completely eliminated...but you're just as likely to get hurt walking to a friend's house.

Being "daddy's girl" stinks sometimes...some dad's will always see their daughters as fragile little beings that need to be protected...but remind him (gently) that you are growing up and he can't protect you from everything forever.

I do have two more questions to ask, too.

1. Do you have any underlying medical condition that may be (at least part of) the reason he's worried about you playing?

If this is the case, you'd have to discuss it with your doctor.

2. Are you in a one-parent home?

It's hard enough for a daddy to see that their daughter is growing up...but if your dad is a single father, it's even harder for dad's in that situation to let go of their little girl.

Most of us are adults and I know it may be hard for you to understand where he's coming from...but see if you can get him to sign up here at Baseball-Fever, too. Have him post in this particular forum. I don't know about others, but I'd be more than willing to talk to him and listen to his concerns.

[NotAboutEgo]

I would love to talk to him as well. 5LilPlayers brought up some really good points. The first step is talking with him and finding out the reason he doesn't want you to play. Then, you go from there to see what you can do to open his mind to it. But, if he hasn't given you a reason and just says you can't play, then he should work on his communication with you so that you know where he's coming from. Then, at least, you have something to work with. You have a right to know why he feels this way.

One of the most important things a former baseball coach (who now is coaching a men's college team) taught me about learning to become a coach, a leader, and a manager is... to always give the how's and the why's with the what's. The what part of your situation is that your dad said he doesn't want you to play baseball. But, he has yet to give you WHY he doesn't want you to play, and also HOW he came to that conclusion.

One of the biggest things that creates friction and animosity between 2 or more people is miscommunication... not communicating effectively and clearly, or not communicating at all.

So, communicate with your dad clearly and effectively, and he should do the same for you.

[9fruitcrush9]

He was a single dad for a while and I dont have a real biological mom (well i do but she passed away years ago)I have a step mom so it probably is hard for him.All the sports I play are travel and/or on a school team,. thanks everyone!! I will try when the time is right.

[NotAboutEgo]

It probably is hard for him considering the circumstances, but it still isn't a reason to not let you play. If it's a situation where he doesn't want you to do too much at once, you could give up one sport to play baseball. It could also be from a financial standpoint. But, as you said, talk to him when the time is right for it. That is a good idea. Good luck!

[9fruitcrush9]

thanks a lot hopefully it will work!!

[NotAboutEgo]

You're welcome.

[DownUnderDodger]

9fruitcrush9 I have some questions that maybe relative:

Is there a girl's baseball team in your area that you can join, or would you have to play in a boys/mixed team? If it is the latter, maybe your dad's fear could be more related to the interaction with the boys or that you may not be "good enough" to match it with them. If the latter it could be that your dad is simply being over protective.

Do any of your girlfriends play baseball? If so perhaps you could point that out to him, and maybe even get their parents to talk to him.

What does your stepmum have to say about this? Does she support him, or is she on your side? Can you talk to her discreetly to see if she can try to get your dad to see your point of view?

Does your 5 year old brother like to play ball and if so does your dad play ball with him? Do you play ball with him at all?

I really hope things work out with you and you can get to the diamond!

[DownUnderDodger]

Hey 9fruitcrush9, any progress in your dilemma??

[bluezebra]

What future do you have in baseball? N-O-N-E. In fast pitch softball, you may get a college scholarship, and there's a women's pro fast pitch league. Be realistic. Look to your future.

Bob

[digglahhh]

Yeah, look to your future...maybe you should quit sports altogether and start studying for the Series 7.:rolleyes:

With all due respect that is terrible advice, BZ.

Children should be allowed to be children, this girl is twelve years old, she does not need to "plan for her future" now. That type of thinking is so pervasive nowadays, it leads children to lead lives that are so compartmentalized, sanitary and such the antithesis of what childhood experiences can really be.

This girl wants to do something PROGRESSIVE, she doesn't want to play a derivitive of baseball, she wants to play baseball! Telling her to think about her future is, ideologically and effectively, tantamount to telling her to accept the boundaries placed upon women, to surrender to the notion that women should accept fastpitch softball and embrace it as their form of baseball.

When I played Little League there were a decent amount of girls when I was very young but by the time I was about 13 or 14 there was only one left. She was good too. I remember I was pitching in the All Star Game and I nailed her right in the front shoulder, I felt worse about it than she did. She actually just shook it off and trotted down to first. Her next time up, I wasn't pitching anymore, but she got right back in there and hit a rope up the middle. She was a girl who succeeded in a boys game, and most of us who could play thought that was really cool. Most of those who got angry about having to play with a girl weren't nearly as good as she was anyway.

Anyway, I think her desire to play is thinking about her future, in a more abstract but powerful way. It is thinking about how she is going to react to obstacles that she may have to face because of her gender.

[DownUnderDodger]

Anyway, I think her desire to play is thinking about her future, in a more abstract but powerful way. It is thinking about how she is going to react to obstacles that she may have to face because of her gender.
Well said!!! Defeat the stereotypes!!

[NotAboutEgo]

Yeah, look to your future...maybe you should quit sports altogether and start studying for the Series 7.:rolleyes:

With all due respect that is terrible advice, BZ.

Children should be allowed to be children, this girl is twelve years old, she does not need to "plan for her future" now. That type of thinking is so pervasive nowadays, it leads children to lead lives that are so compartmentalized, sanitary and such the antithesis of what childhood experiences can really be.

This girl wants to do something PROGRESSIVE, she doesn't want to play a derivitive of baseball, she wants to play baseball! Telling her to think about her future is, ideologically and effectively, tantamount to telling her to accept the boundaries placed upon women, to surrender to the notion that women should accept fastpitch softball and embrace it as their form of baseball.

When I played Little League there were a decent amount of girls when I was very young but by the time I was about 13 or 14 there was only one left. She was good too. I remember I was pitching in the All Star Game and I nailed her right in the front shoulder, I felt worse about it than she did. She actually just shook it off and trotted down to first. Her next time up, I wasn't pitching anymore, but she got right back in there and hit a rope up the middle. She was a girl who succeeded in a boys game, and most of us who could play thought that was really cool. Most of those who got angry about having to play with a girl weren't nearly as good as she was anyway.

Anyway, I think her desire to play is thinking about her future, in a more abstract but powerful way. It is thinking about how she is going to react to obstacles that she may have to face because of her gender.

Great advice and perspective, Digglahhh.

Number one, why should EVERYTHING a child thinks about and wants to do have to be about their future? Why can't kids just be kids and do things they enjoy? Why do adults see to it that children do chores and work (because that's what they had to do when they were kids) instead of being allowed to just be kids? I absolutely don't get that mentality. Is there a law stating that kids have to give up their childhood and work? Give me a break.

OK, now about the bigot perspective of BZ. Why should one, whether they be female or male, give up something they love to do and that they are good at doing, just because a bunch of people like you tell them they can't do it and should stick to something they've been forced to do for years, against their will? Refer to the first paragraph, AND, why should a young girl who has everything going for her to do and experience whatever it is she chooses to experience listen to someone like you who has a very closed mind? Why should she sit and give up playing baseball, even though it is still dominated by huge egos and insecurity, when she can help turn the status quo by playing the sport she chooses? Why should she sit and say, "Well, most girls are playing softball and so many people who have closed minds are saying to stop the nonsense and play softball instead of baseball, just because I'm a girl, and to stop dreaming and to stop working for something I choose to do and to give up everything I enjoy because some people don't want me to do it even though it's not hurting anyone, not even them, and to just sit around and mope because there is no hope for anything that doesn't exist at the moment, so that's exactly what I'm going to do."

How would you feel, BZ, if someone told you that you have to stop doing something you enjoy because they were uncomfortable with the fact that you are doing it, even though it's not impeding or imposing upon anyone in any way?

How ASSANINE!!!

Also, you should educate yourself about what's going on with women's baseball around the world, because women's collegiate baseball DOES exist, and I'm sure there will be scholarships given soon for women who are good enough to play at the collegiate level.

[Baseball Mum]

At least one of the Australian women playing in the World Cup in Taiwan at the moment is on a Sports scholarship for her university based solely on her baseball achievements.

Most girl/women baseballers I know will only play softball if they absolutely have to for some reason, and then it's only a temporary thing. They don't see it as the same game, and, neither should they. They see it, in fact, as a lesser game (though of course the softballers wouldn't agree). When what you love is running and stealing bases, then baseball is the only game.

9fruitcrush9 the suggestions made to you earlier in this thread. Go with them and have a mature talk to your Dad, and good luck to you.

[5LilPlayers]

What future do you have in baseball? N-O-N-E. In fast pitch softball, you may get a college scholarship, and there's a women's pro fast pitch league. Be realistic. Look to your future.

Bob
She's 12. Why "look to her future" NOW??? She's only in approximately the 5th - 7th grade. Kids have until high school to stress about that...and some still don't even know "what they want to be when they grow up" until after their first year, or two, of college.

Not to mention, a lot of colleges are starting to form (or have formed) women's baseball teams.

A wise woman once said:

"The past is what controls the present, and the present is what creates the future."

Speaking in baseball terms:

The past (AAGPBL) is what controls the present (many women and young girls seeing A League of Their Own, reading books on the AAGPBL, seeing one of the actual documentaries about the league, etc.), the present (more and more girls who desperately want to play BASEball - not be forced into softball because of people like you) is what creates the future (more and more people allowing females to play in "male" leagues and on "male" teams, as well as those trying to get female leagues started).

Now, BZ, you go back to taking out the garbage, farting loudly in public, and scratching your behind like so many of the other baseball bigots!

[NotAboutEgo]

She's 12. Why "look to her future" NOW??? She's only in approximately the 5th - 7th grade. Kids have until high school to stress about that...and some still don't even know "what they want to be when they grow up" until after their first year, or two, of college.

Not to mention, a lot of colleges are starting to form (or have formed) women's baseball teams.

A wise woman once said:

"The past is what controls the present, and the present is what creates the future."

Speaking in baseball terms:

The past (AAGPBL) is what controls the present (many women and young girls seeing A League of Their Own, reading books on the AAGPBL, seeing one of the actual documentaries about the league, etc.), the present (more and more girls who desperately want to play BASEball - not be forced into softball because of people like you) is what creates the future (more and more people allowing females to play in "male" leagues and on "male" teams, as well as those trying to get female leagues started).

Now, BZ, you go back to taking out the garbage, farting loudly in public, and scratching your behind like so many of the other baseball bigots!

:laugh :laugh :laugh :laugh :laugh :laugh :crazy :D Love your post!

[CuriousBoston]

Bob
Aren't too many blue zebras around. Less blue zebras than dinosaurs. You were posting to a child.

Young women posting on Baseball-Fever are going to be supported, and treated with respect. You want to discuss with the adult females here, fine. Don't post to a child again with your lack of knowledge about women's baseball, your "slap in the face" tone.

This is a family site; the moderators will support us on this. I suggest an apology is in order. Perhaps you would like to PM it to one of the adults to see if it is suitable. I suggest a female with children.

You may notice that both males and females took you to task. I was thrilled when I saw our youngest female BF'r's first post (baseball-fever poster). I look forward to her posts, hope for more young women to join.

Takes deep breath. Bob, I do hope you are still reading this thread, thinking about the replies, the children in your life, maybe even did a bit of googling of women's baseball. If you wish to discuss this privately, I'm sure any of us would be willing.

[5LilPlayers]

If you wish to discuss this privately, I'm sure any of us would be willing.

:dance Oh, oh, oh, BZ, pick me, pick me! :waving I'll volunteer!!!! :laugh

I am sorry about my post.....to a degree. Don't want to get in trouble with the Mods....but guys like that just make me so mad. :( :mad: :evil

It's hard enough with people in the real world putting females down (of all ages) who want to play, or even just know a lot about baseball...kids, especially, don't need to come here to see that.

Anyone heard from fruitcrush?? Has she at least PMed anyone to let...anyone...know what's going on?

I do wish she could convince her dad to sign up here. Maybe we (the females), as well as the open-minded males, could get to the bottom of things...figure out exactly why he doesn't want her to play.

My husband wasn't thrilled when my first present, to ALL of our kids, was a baseball and a teeny, tiny (albeit, felt-like) glove. He didn't say much with our son, but with our first daughter, I got "Is that REALLY appropriate for a girl?" After seeing how much I loved the game...and how much the kids (so far) love it and want to get out and play...he finally broke down and got himself a mitt and a decent bat. "Can't beat 'em, join 'em" I guess? LOL

He's trying to get me into football. But it was funny, at the campground our family goes to...last year, when the "boys" were tossing around the old pigskin, my son made the comment of "Mom! You can't play, you're a girl!" And my husband's only reply..."I can NOT believe you just said that to your mother....you better run, boy!" LOL I loved football when I was younger, too...but being only 5' 3" and not exactly a "heavyweight"...I knew I couldn't do much with it other than powder puff with the girls...and my heart already belonged totally and completely to baseball, anyway.

At 12, training should have already began, if anyone is to make it onto a college team...male or female.

I just hope that after this, if BZ is still reading, maybe he'll do a little search for "women's baseball" and realize that it is...slowly but surely...catching on here in the USA...and that female leagues are quite popular in other countries already. I'm off to do a little more researching of my own...as soon as I finish reading the rest of the new posts here. :lookitup

[digglahhh]

Ironically, it is the manifestation of the alpha-male credo that bigger is better that ruined the sport in the eyes of many traditionalist fans.

[Williamsburg2599]

Aren't too many blue zebras around. Less blue zebras than dinosaurs. You were posting to a child.

Young women posting on Baseball-Fever are going to be supported, and treated with respect. You want to discuss with the adult females here, fine. Don't post to a child again with your lack of knowledge about women's baseball, your "slap in the face" tone.

This is a family site; the moderators will support us on this. I suggest an apology is in order. Perhaps you would like to PM it to one of the adults to see if it is suitable. I suggest a female with children.

You may notice that both males and females took you to task. I was thrilled when I saw our youngest female BF'r's first post (baseball-fever poster). I look forward to her posts, hope for more young women to join.

Takes deep breath. Bob, I do hope you are still reading this thread, thinking about the replies, the children in your life, maybe even did a bit of googling of women's baseball. If you wish to discuss this privately, I'm sure any of us would be willing.
You, 5LilPlayers, Not About Ego, digglahhh and everyone else are very, very right here. She should be allowed to play. She didn't say her dad wouldn't let her be a pro baseball player or something like that, she just wants to play. And if she does want to go pro, then no one has the right to tell her not to.

[NotAboutEgo]

You, 5LilPlayers, Not About Ego, digglahhh and everyone else are very, very right here. She should be allowed to play. She didn't say her dad wouldn't let her be a pro baseball player or something like that, she just wants to play. And if she does want to go pro, then no one has the right to tell her not to.

BINGO!!! :clapping

[sandlot]

"The past is what controls the present, and the present is what creates the future".The very wise person who said that could have been wiser still. Please stick with me on this, because although what I'm going to write sounds theoretical, it has very real implications for how we choose to handle our lives, and that of course includes how one responds (or not) to baseball bigotry or to anything else.

IMHO, the past does not control the present. Nor should it. The past is gone. The only thing that can affect the present is the present. The present also does not create the future, because the future does not exist. The future is a mental construct, a present that hasn't yet happened and when it does will slide instantly into the past. In short, the only time that exists, ever, is the present (a theoretical possibility of delving into the past is described in Stephen Hawking's "A Brief History of Time," but none of us, including the professor, is ever going to experience it).

What the past can do is to inform our present. It can provide us with knowledge that we can choose to employ in the present, which is why it's worth studying. That's the positive side -- depending, of course, on what we do with the knowledge when make our choices. But the past also causes great suffering when a person tries to make the past continue to exist in the present, even though it's gone. A common example is the difficulty of accepting that someone close to us has died, or wanting the baseball of the 1930's to exist in the year 2006.

The future causes suffering when we try to make our present continue into the future, even though that is impossible, or try to shape our present based upon what we imagine the future to be. An example of the former is accepting that someone we love is going to die and doing all we can to prevent it, or to deny it. An example of the latter might be the parent who's dreamed that her daughter will be a neurosurgeon but simply cannot accept that her child's deepest dream is to forego medical school in order to marry the butcher, have kids, bake fresh cookies and play shortstop for the Hens.:)

If we don't live as much as humanly possible in the present, we will allow ourselves to be controlled by the past, even though that is needless and a source of pain. And our future, to accept the useful contruct, will be more difficult when it becomes the present because we will not have improved upon our decisions and will repeat the same choices -- an enduring source of suffering (often labeled "people never learn").

For example:

Now, BZ, you go back to taking out the garbage, farting loudly in public, and scratching your behind like so many of the other baseball bigots!This is wholly unnecessary, gratuitous stereotyping and is every bit as repugnant as what it seeks to confront. With this kind of response, the cycle of bigotry just goes on and everyone can feel justified -- and I'm sure that the writer feels very justified. That is why in my posts I've kept repeating one thought: We have to choose carefully what we despise because that is the thing that we are most likely to become. And this is why, digglaah, you are right: I reject the metaphor of combat for the reason mentioned in a previous post about a comic strip character.

[SoxSon]

I am sorry about my post.....to a degree. Don't want to get in trouble with the Mods....but guys like that just make me so mad. :( :mad: :evil


The best thing to do when disagreeing with a fellow forumer is to respond with logic and civility. I'd say you had one out of two, 5LilPlayers. ;)

Everyone be nice. Aim comments at the post, not the poster, ok?

Thanks.

[Wade8813]

Is it possible that your dad just feels you have too many sports in your schedule at once? That you'll burn out? (I couldn't tell for sure from your post).

[bluezebra]

Yeah, look to your future...maybe you should quit sports altogether and start studying for the Series 7.:rolleyes:

With all due respect that is terrible advice, BZ.

Children should be allowed to be children, this girl is twelve years old, she does not need to "plan for her future" now. That type of thinking is so pervasive nowadays, it leads children to lead lives that are so compartmentalized, sanitary and such the antithesis of what childhood experiences can really be.

This girl wants to do something PROGRESSIVE, she doesn't want to play a derivitive of baseball, she wants to play baseball! Telling her to think about her future is, ideologically and effectively, tantamount to telling her to accept the boundaries placed upon women, to surrender to the notion that women should accept fastpitch softball and embrace it as their form of baseball.

When I played Little League there were a decent amount of girls when I was very young but by the time I was about 13 or 14 there was only one left. She was good too. I remember I was pitching in the All Star Game and I nailed her right in the front shoulder, I felt worse about it than she did. She actually just shook it off and trotted down to first. Her next time up, I wasn't pitching anymore, but she got right back in there and hit a rope up the middle. She was a girl who succeeded in a boys game, and most of us who could play thought that was really cool. Most of those who got angry about having to play with a girl weren't nearly as good as she was anyway.

Anyway, I think her desire to play is thinking about her future, in a more abstract but powerful way. It is thinking about how she is going to react to obstacles that she may have to face because of her gender.

HORSE PUCKEY. I didn't even REMOTELY suggest thgat she gives up all sports. How many women are in college baseball? How many college scholarships are given out every year for softball. THOUSANDS. How many women's pro baseball leagues are there? I don't know of any. There's a very good women's pro softball league, and it gets national TV coverage.

Let her put her ego aside, and be realistic. There is NO future for a female baseball player. And 12-years-old is not too early to look to the future. It'll come sooner than she, and you, thinks.

Bob

[NotAboutEgo]

HORSE PUCKEY. I didn't even REMOTELY suggest thgat she gives up all sports. How many women are in college baseball? How many college scholarships are given out every year for softball. THOUSANDS. How many women's pro baseball leagues are there? I don't know of any. There's a very good women's pro softball league, and it gets national TV coverage.

Let her put her ego aside, and be realistic. There is NO future for a female baseball player. And 12-years-old is not too early to look to the future. It'll come sooner than she, and you, thinks.

Bob

Are you saying you don't know much about how far along women's baseball has come in the past 10-15 years in the U.S and around the world? Because from your posts, that's exactly what it sounds like to me. Hmmmm, there are many women all over the country who are playing on men's collegiate baseball teams (Molly McKesson being only 1 example, and she IS on scholarship for baseball ON A MEN'S TEAM) and the numbers are growing. I personally was asked by a college baseball coach if I have college playing eligibility left, because he saw my hitting and bunting mechanics and success. I do have 4 years of playing eligibility left (I'm 34 years old at this time), but I didn't go after it, because playing on a men's collegiate team is not where my interests lie. My interests are in helping to advance girls' and women's baseball and playing in leagues of all women. If I had been asked that, back in 1989, when I first started college and when there were very few, if any, women's baseball teams in this country, I most likely would have gone for it... because, it would have been a chance for me to play organized baseball. Also, there are a lot of girls who are playing baseball for their high school teams, and those numbers are also on the rise. Did you know there are many women's collegiate baseball programs in Australia and Japan? Did you know, in Australia, women play in men's leagues... in the competitive ones that could be close to the minor leagues in the U.S.? Did you know that the Canadian government and other countries' governments SUPPORT women's baseball? Did you know the IBAF (International Baseball Association and Federation) supports women's baseball... it sanctions the international Women's World Cup of Baseball which happens every two years?

It just so happens that a women's baseball club program was formed by John Kovach at St. Mary's University and Notre Dame University and that program started play this past spring. Other colleges have expressed interest in starting their own women's club baseball programs, and they want to use the St. Mary's/Notre Dame program as a template. I will be speaking with someone soon who is interested in starting a women's baseball program at a university in Michigan.

There were women's pro baseball teams and leagues in the past, but people who are bigots have stood in the way of their progress and existence. Well, things are changing now, because many women and many men are fed up with women being told they can't and shouldn't play baseball and that softball is for them.

It's not a matter of ego for this 12 year old. It's a matter of knowing who she is and wanting to do what she is interested in doing, and there is NOTHING wrong with that. It's also a matter of not letting the status quo and bigots and the "idea" of what a woman should do stand in her way and determine her life for her. Seems to me the one who is letting their ego get in their way is you.

The U.S. and many other countries have official national baseball teams, and they are participating in international competitions. Modern women's international baseball has been happening for going on 10 years now. Each year, additional countries are creating national women's baseball teams to participate in international competitions, and there are a lot a national competitions going on in these countries.

Women's baseball is growing around the globe at many levels. It takes time, but it's happening. It's like anything else that is and was in its growing stages. It takes work, effort, money, coordination of efforts, organization, etc. to get something going, but having to work to get it done should not deter the determined from reaching their goals.

I guess women should not have done the same things to play ice hockey and basketball or any other sport. They should have stopped fighting for their rights to play and should have let all their dreams and desires and motivation go. You know, neither basketball nor ice hockey ever got anywhere, so there was no point in creating girls' and women's leagues at all levels, and jeez, the WNBA just sprang up all of a sudden, overnight, out of someone's back pocket, just like magic!!! POOOOOF!!!

"There is NO future for a female baseball player." Yeah, bluezebra is right. No woman should ever hope for anything including the advancement of women's baseball. We should just put our gloves down and give up and let others' control us and tell us what to do even if it has nothing to do with them. No one should ever look to the future trying to see what could happen and what could exist... not ever trying to create anything new... just being satisfied with what we have at the present.

Because there currently are 1000's of softball scholarships given and there is a pro softball league, all of us women who play baseball should just give up and go to softball, because it's not right for us to play baseball and we will never have anything in the future in terms of baseball.

Why, bz, do you say you weren't suggesting that this 12 year old give up her other sports, but she should give up her dream of playing baseball? What is the difference? Why is baseball so "taboo" from women playing it. This is ONLY based on insecurity and ego on your part... insecurity and ego that gets in the way of you letting go of the notion of a female playing baseball and you being OK with that. There is NO other explanation.

Also, why should a girl give up her desire and dream to play baseball based on the current status of whether there are umpteen baseball scholarships given to women or not? Can she just play for fun and enjoyment?

I was once this 12 year old girl... who dreamed of and desired to play baseball. I didn't give up my dream or desire to play. I founded a women's baseball team in 1998. I have been playing organized baseball, with BOTH men and women for 8 years (I started playing sandlot baseball with my sister, cousins and friends when I was young), I have been asked about playing on a men's college team, I have been playing in women's baseball tourneys all over the U.S. (including trying out for the U.S. women's national team), I have gained so much experience and knowledge and have polished my skills to a higher level and will continue doing so, I have made a lot of great friends, both men and women through these experiences, AND I HAVE LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT AND WOULDN'T GIVE IT UP FOR ANYTHING!!!

Will I ever have the chance to play pro baseball in a women's league (something that was a dream of mine as a child)... most likely not. Will other girls ever have this chance... OF COURSE.

Please don't tell this 12 year old she has no future in women's baseball and that she needs to give all her dreams up, and don't ever tell any female they can't play baseball and need to stick to softball. Stifling words and actions are very anti-progressive.

How would you like it if someone told you that you have to stop doing things you enjoy? :noidea

[NotAboutEgo]

At least this 12 year old will grow up one day and will be able to make decisions on her own and will be able to play baseball, if she so chooses to.

[5LilPlayers]

IMHO, the past does notcontrol the present. Nor should it. The past is gone.

In the past, women couldn't vote. In the past, some brave Americans stood up for the rights of African-Americans so they could be treated as equals instead of slaves. Need I go on?

How can you say that the past doesn't control the present...or that it shouldn't? Yes, the past is gone, but the past always reflects on the future. Sure, there are those who may still think women shouldn't vote and some groups who think the color of your skin matters....sadly, it may always be that way. But the past influnces the future (our present) in some way, shape or form almost constantly...and due to that, the present is connected to the future as well.

I stand by my baseball example of that.

This is wholly unnecessary, gratuitous stereotyping and is every bit as repugnant as what it seeks to confront.

Which is why I did apoligize for it later.

[5LilPlayers]

How many women are in college baseball?

Not many, BUT the numbers are growing.

How many college scholarships are given out every year for softball. THOUSANDS.

And some are given to women for BASEBALL as well. Whether it be one or..even one million....does it matter? If only one college EVER offered women's baseball scholarships, it's still something for a dedicated, hard-working female to aim for, if it's the sport they truly love.

How many women's pro baseball leagues are there? <SNIP> There is NO future for a female baseball player. And 12-years-old is not too early to look to the future. It'll come sooner than she, and you, thinks.

Women's pro leagues in the USA....none at the moment. HOWEVER, did you ever stop to think that as this IS a 12 yr. old...in the next 8 to 10 years -- when she graduates high school or from a typical 4 year college -- by that time, there just MIGHT be a pro league for women? How can a woman gain the skills needed for the professional level if girls can't play hardball "now", or are forced into softball, while they ARE 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, etc.?

For any little girl...beginning at 2 or 3 (on basics) or even 12 or 13 now....as long as they play as often as possible now and/or understand the game completely, even if it takes more than 10 or 15 years for a pro women's league, if they feel they're too old to play...when...NOT "IF"...WHEN it happens...they could still make excellent coaches (thus still being involved in the game) for a professional league later.

And at 12...again, who says she NEEDS to look to her future. ALL kids need to be active...aiming for 60 minutes of "hard" exercise a day...to fight the growing trend of obesity in children not to mention the health related problems that can stem from obesity. Be it baseball, gymnastics, field hockey or whatever...at least it would be getting her out and active, whether she's thinking about it from a professional stand point or just thinking "I want to do this now because it's fun."

My son plays baseball...currently 10...so yes, I know how soon that future comes. I often marvel at how quickly the years are going by. Yet he's been saying since before he even started school that he wanted to work for NASA. Does that mean he should give up baseball, we should buy him a telescope and make him focus ONLY on the stars, planets and solar system? I KNOW...even being male, he is not looking for a future in the sport. He plays because he enjoys it in the "now"...and for me, being a parent, I love it too because it keeps him active. He's not sitting at home staring at the TV, playing video games non-stop, or sitting staring into space with a constant refrain of "I'm bored!".

Female OR male...just because they play baseball now (3 yr. olds to college "kids") doesn't mean they are...OR should "have" to be...looking towards a future in the sport. Kids play what they like because it's fun. The moment it stops being for for them, they quit that activity -- be it sports or other interests.

Heck, the kid in me would love to organize a block-wide game of hide and go seek (kids AND parents play!)...just for the FUN of it. Something to do to get the kids active and get the parents involved with their children. Granted, if they ever started hading out scholarships for Hide and Go Seek, I'd be worried. LOL

All in all......

Let kids be kids...let them have fun and enjoy life while they can...as you pretty much said yourself...adulthood comes all too soon.